Hmmph

I was reading an article a while back on toxic relationships and it said that there are times when you just have to 'divorce' those people in your life who drag you down and bleed you dry.  I've been thinking about that and rolling it around in my head wondering how exactly does one do that?  What would that look like?  Do you make up a divorce decree and present it to them?  Write a 'Dear John' letter (it's not you, it's me) and tell them you are breaking up?  Ignore them indefinitely until they go away? Move and not leave a forwarding address? The article neglected to spell out those details.

Sometimes I feel like I wanna divorce everybody so I don't have to be hurt or disappointed for awhile. Just put the 'closed for business' sign up and lock the doors.  And when I say everybody, I mean everyone... friends, husbands, kids, sisters, dogs, neighbours, assorted family members, the butcher, the baker... you name it!  I don't wanna see, hear, smell or feel anybody in my personal space. That would be nice, wouldn't it?  Calm, quiet, peaceful and stressless... not forever, but long enough to heal the soul and strengthen yourself for the battle.  Long enough to know you'd kind of like to connect with someone.   Getting antsy for simple conversation.

Now that I think of it, I did kinda do that once.  I went to the Cook Islands by myself when I turned 50 and I got to spend a lot of time alone.  I loved it.  Some people can't tolerate that kind of isolation, but I grew up being by myself, so I am used to it.  The trick is knowing when enough is enough and not too much.  It's easy to isolate oneself to the point of becoming detached and totally withdrawn; easy to fall into dark places.  It's a fine line.  Balance is required.

So, is 'divorcing' your people  the only way to get that?  No, obviously not. However sometimes, divorce is ones last hope for survival.